Colossians 3:2-4 Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things. For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God. When Christ, who is your life, appears, then you also will appear with him in glory.
Last Sunday after church, my husband and I (and the kids) were driving to his Mom’s house for our weekly lunch together. I don’t even remember now what started our conversation but I started crying. He was not criticizing me or upset with me, not raising his voice with anger or disappointment - he was definitely not at fault for my tears. During worship, just a short time earlier, I was moved to tears by the song Holy Forever by Chris Tomlin. So these tears weren’t the first of the day. I wondered if it was just time for a “good cry”. But as I talked out with Ryan about what was on my mind, I realized that I had been thinking about a lot in the past couple of weeks that I had just been harboring inside.
Buckle Up. I am going to vulnerably share some things that were heavy on my mind that now I know caused my tears.
My Mom. She is currently cancer-free (Thank you, God) but she had a port put in at the beginning of July so that she can receive monthly immunotherapy. Her oncologist decided this was the best course of action because her veins were not functioning anymore. The amount of pain my Mom had to endure each month just to get this IV was beginning to wear on her to the point of wanting to stop the immunotherapy. Her oncologist feels that without this treatment he isn’t confident her immune system can fight off a mild cold or virus.
This is my Mom’s journey but it is still a lot to weigh on my mind.
My late sister-in-law. Every 4th of July since she has passed, I have struggled. She married into a family that loves the 4th and every year has a huge celebration! We attended this celebration with her and this family for many years. Even now, after she has gone to Heaven, we go and celebrate. The food is abundant and amazing, the kids have a blast with outdoor activities, it is good to connect with so many and they seriously have the best fireworks show in the U.S. But there are so many dynamics of this for me. New relationships are forming with members of this extended family and I wonder “Do we still fit here?”. Memories come rushing back of my sister-in-law and me talking about a struggle I was going through at the time and I hear her voice encouraging me. I see and hear my nephew (her son) running, playing, and laughing with cousins and friends - enjoying all the things this celebration is about. This year I just struggled with being truly happy at this event because I was missing her and wondering what my part is in the midst of it all.
This is grief. I am still on the journey and it’s a lot to weigh on my mind.
My job. At the beginning of June, I found out that my specific position would be changing. At first, I was surprised and grieved that I would not be returning to the position I loved. I think I will grieve a little more once school starts. But I am very grateful to the organization I work for because from the beginning they have been supportive and wanted me to stay as an employee. But for the past month, as I have been in communication with them, different options have been presented. There was uncertainty on what exactly I would be doing which I don’t handle well because I am definitely a “planner”. I now have confirmation of where I will be serving this coming school year (Thank you, God) but in the back of my mind, I think “Will it change again?”
This is change. It adds stress which is a lot to weigh on my mind.
My sister. She has been going through a very difficult time for almost a year now. It is her story to tell if she chooses to but she moved closer to me and my family recently. We haven’t lived near each other since we both lived at home with our parents. We are very different people who have lived through some difficult things. We are older, with kids and jobs and responsibilities that need our attention. We are both adjusting and trying to rebuild our relationship in a new season.
This is my sister’s journey but it still weighs heavy on my mind.
On that Sunday, in the minivan, I shared these heavy things in my mind with my best friend and the love of my life. Through my tears, I heard the Lord whisper to me Colossians 3:2-4. Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things. For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God. When Christ, who is your life, appears, then you also will appear with him in glory.
I had been spending so much time thinking about these earthly things that I had become consumed by them. Each of these things is important to me and to God. But I had forgotten to include God in my thoughts. I had not talked to HIM about them. I had held them all in my mind and on that Sunday they finally came pouring out in tears! I needed to give God my thoughts, feelings, stress, grief, and concerns. I needed to set my mind on Christ and what He has done for me, for my mom, for my sister-in-law, in my job situation, and for my own sister.
Remember the worship song that moved me during worship? That song is all about focusing on God and WHO He is! The Holy Spirit was stirring my heart, starting to open my mind to WHO I really needed! I needed to speak out the things above that were taking space in my mind. And I needed to take my eyes off the earthly things and set my eyes on things above. The second verse of Holy Forever says:
“If you've been forgiven
And if you've been redeemed
Sing the song forever to the Lamb
If you walk in freedom
And if you bear His name
Sing the song forever to the Lamb
We'll sing the song forever and amen”
That’s ME! I am forgiven! I am redeemed! I walk in freedom! I bear His name! My life now is hidden with Christ! (Colossians 3:4) When my mind is bombarded and filled with earthly worries and concerns, I will set my mind on Him and forever sing “Holy”!! Will you join me?
Romans 8:6 The mind governed by the flesh is death, but the mind governed by the Spirit is life and peace.
